If you are like most people, you live with one or more other people.  The problem with this is that no two people have the same level of cleanliness.  Invariably, one person is going to end up being the "cleaner" one and one will be the "messy" one.  And somehow you have to come to grips with that.  


Housework varies from the #1 to #3 cause of stress in marriages & families, right along with money, child raising, and sex.  It is the topic of many a fight and has even caused the breakup of many marriages.  Therefore, it is worth giving the topic some time and attention.  


I believe the way to get the cleanie people to live in peace with the messy people in the house is a little bit of open and honest conversation with a good healthy dose of respect and tolerance.  Then you can get past some of these stalemates and power struggles that have been going on for years.  


Part of an honest conversation is to ask for what you want.  What a refreshing concept!  No more criticizing and blaming the the other person, no more passive aggressive manipulation, you just come right out and say what it is you need.  Here is something I came up with for my family a couple of years ago.  It's still written on a piece of paper on the side of the fridge as a reminder.  


Statement of Intention:  My desire for a clean house will be respected even if it is not understood or shared.  This is my only home and I deserve to live in a place that meets my needs and my desire for a peaceful, clean place to relax.  I do not deserve to be embarrassed when company stops by unexpectedly.  Even if it’s not fair, they blame me when the house is messy and not you.  I shouldn’t have to bear that shame when it isn’t my fault.  I will expect your cooperation because you love me and want me to be happy and having a clean home is necessary to make me happy.  I don’t expect miracles or extraordinary efforts, but everyone needs to do to some basic things on a daily basis to help keep the place in order.  I would love to have your praise and compliments, but I will settle for you not criticizing my efforts and trying to bring me down. 


That is calm, respectful, assertive, and to the point.  And it did get results.  After I wrote that, my family began to see that having a clean home was a priority for me and that I really wasn't asking for anything unreasonable or extraordinary, and they began to help more and complain less. 


My husband isn't a deep thinker, so he wouldn't have taken the trouble to write anything down, but I would imagine that a similar statement for the messy person would go something like this.  


Statement of intent:  This is my home as well, and I deserve a place to relax and enjoy myself without having to be criticized every time there is something out of place.  I am not a bad person and I do not deserve to be treated like one, regardless of the way I choose to take care of my belongings.  If you love me and want me to be happy, my differences need to be respected and tolerated. In exchange for my efforts in keeping the public areas of the house to your standards, I need to be allowed to have areas of the house to do as I please, free from guilt or criticism.  


With that as a starting point, do you think these two people would have a better chance of living together without killing each other or ending up in divorce court?  Seems to me that seeing the other person's point of view would go a long ways towards developing some compromises that would work out for both parties and bring a little peace to the household.  


What are your strategies for dealing with the cleanies vs. messies situation in your household?

Come back every Monday for a fresh dose of Clutterbugs.  If you would like to see past posts on the subjects, just click the label at the bottom of the page for a complete list.  


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Sometimes I think the saving habit is one of the hardest habits to develop.  But that savings account has saved my butt so many times, I just don't understand how people function without one.  

I think the trap people fall into is thinking that they don't have "enough" money to develop a regular savings habit.  That's kind of delusional thinking because the emergencies aren't going to stop coming just because you don't have the money on hand to deal with them.  So when the car breaks or the water heater floods the basement, you are going to reach for the credit card, borrow from relatives, or heaven forbid, resort to the dreaded payday loan.  Those are all strategies that just dig you deeper in the hole. 

So, how to deal with that pesky problem with finding the money to fund your savings account.  The answer is microsavings - lots of tiny changes to generate extra money to save.  Here are some ideas for you:


Illegal Tender:  This was my Mom's favorite strategy.  She would declare certain denominations of money as "Illegal Tender" - usually quarters, but sometimes just nickles or dimes.  Then she would sort the extra change out of her wallet every night and put it in a special jar.  It added up a lot faster than you would think and she would usually be able to deposit an extra $30-$50 per month to have savings account.  There are some banks that will do this for you automatically now. Every time you use your debit card, it rounds the transaction up to the nearest dollar amount and moves the change off to your savings account - sweet!


Extreme Couponing:  It takes extra time and dedication, but you can save a lot of money with coupons.  The trick is to figure out how much money you actually saved and bank it.  Otherwise, it just slips off into the wild blue yonder and you never seem to benefit from it.  


Brown Bagging: If you aren't already doing it, you can save money through brown bagging your lunches, or other types of cutbacks.  For instance, meatless Mondays, breakfast for dinner, or cutting back on eating out.  Again, the important part is to track your savings and funnel that money into the bank.  


Garage Sales/Ebay/Craigslist:  If you are not having luck with any of these methods, its time to get more intense.  Start digging around your house for stuff you can sell for extra money.  I've done this for years and I've made thousands and cleared a lot of unwanted stuff out of my house.  In fact, I just made $35 from Amazon just this week.  I had a gift I'd bought for my granddaughter, but it hadn't arrived in time for Christmas.  Rather than return it, I resold it on their website for more than I paid for it (I'd bought it at the sale price & used a $25 gift card), so I made a tidy profit on it.  And I was able to print the postage on my printer and mail it right from my porch!


Extra work:  There's a ton of ways you can fund your savings account by doing extra work.  It doesn't always have to mean a second job, or a heavy-duty commitment like that.  You can occasionally babysit or tutor kids, give piano/guitar lessons, do hair, or clean houses, whatever floats your boat.  I teach stamp classes twice a month and my husband does odd jobs and lawn mowing for people in the neighborhood. 


Direct Sales (party plan businesses):  This one comes with a warning.  Do NOT get into this if you have a shopping problem.  It takes a lot of discipline to make this work properly and not be a liability to your budget.  However, if you're smart and disciplined about it, you can make quite a bit of money in these businesses.  I have sold Stampin' Up! for seven years and Pampered Chef for one.  I don't make a fortune, but it's a nice trickle of extra money, and I get a lot of stuff for free that I would have bought anyway.  

The important thing is to get that money into the bank anyway you can and once it's there - forget about it and let it grow.  


What are your best ideas for microsavings?

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I usually post my Stampin' Stuff on Mondays, but this week I wanted to wait so I could post it to coincide with the start of our largest and best sale of the year.  Sale-a-bration is an event many of our long-time customers save up for all year.  

If you aren't familiar with this promotion, it's pretty simple - from now until the end of March, for every $50 in Stampin' Up! products you purchase, you will get a free SAB item.  The items this year include a more varied list than ever before.  You can not only choose stamp sets, but also a vinyl applique, and a CD packed with digital downloads.There is also a scrapbooking or card making kit that includes paper, ribbons, buttons, and self-adhesive stick on's in some of our freshest Spring colors. 


I haven't posted very often about my Stampin' Up! business and I'm not sure why.  I originally started this blog as a stamping blog, but then I branched out into other topics.  But I've been a stamper for a lot longer than I've been a blogger.  My demonstratorship is my own business that I run out of my home in my "spare" (ha ha!) time!  I enjoy it and it provides a source of income for my family.  And I'm proud of the great service I provide to my customers and the quality products that I sell.  


If you are in the Salt Lake area, I would like to invite you to my monthly classes.  For about the last five years, I have taught a stamp class virtually every month.  I actually have two classes now and I am eyeballing a 3rd one.  My classes are on the 2nd Tuesday evening of every month and the following Thursday.  And if I can get enough interest, I would like to start a new My Digital Studio class to teach digital scrapbooking to my customers.  


If you don't live in the area I have a website that you can order from 24 X 7.  It is AdriansStampClub.stampinup.net or you can Email me with any orders, questions, or comments regarding our products.  There are also some specials for new demonstrators who sign up during Sale-a-bration, so if you've been thinking about it, drop me a line and I'll share some info with you about this opportunity. 


And now, here is today's MDS page.  

These are my two younger boys and this is a very typical pose for them.  It seems like I can't turn around without the two of them wrestling around and monkeying with each other.  But for the most part, it is surprisingly good-natured and they actually get along pretty well.  


I pulled the colors for this project from their shirts.  Our boys always seem to end up in grey - it's just their color, so I used that for our background color, combined with our Night of Navy for the stars and other accents.  Then I used the Genuine Article stamp set to add the little text accents.  


Did I mention that our MDS program can be used on both Macs and PC's?  Or that the images can also be used in Adobe Photoshop or any of the other popular scrapbooking programs?  The program is packed with dozens of complete stamp sets along with our full line of matching cardstock, buttons, ribbons, and a boatload of other accessories.  It's a LOT of stuff and there are new digital downloads coming out onto the site every week.  


So, if you are a crafter, what do you need?  This is a great time to stock up on paper, ink pads, adhesives, and any of the other basic supplies you might need throughout the year.  Why not, when you can get all the great free stuff?  Pop over to my website and take a look at some of the incentives offered.  Or I'd be happy to get a catalog to you.  I only charge $5 plus postage for them.  

AdriansStampClub.stampinup.net

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Most closet organizing articles focus on throwing stuff away.  Sometimes that is a necessary step, but not always.  I mean, you paid a lot of money for those clothes and at some point, you really liked them, so I'm not always in favor of throwing stuff out.  However, you do need your closet to be functional and organized.  

First of all, take a good hard look at your closet.  Is it crammed to the max? Is stuff thrown in there haphazardly?  Do you have enough shelves and hangers for the things you need?  Can you clearly see what you have, so you can quickly put outfits together?  These are the types of problems we are going to look at today.  


What Should be in Your Closet:  The only items that should be in your closet are clothes that fit, are appropriate for the season, are in good repair, and are items that you like and look good in.  


What Shouldn't be in Your Closet:  Everything else!  


Most organizational experts swear by the idea that you should throw out anything that doesn't fit you.  I'm sorry, but I think that is just dumb.  It is a fact of life that people's weight goes up and down throughout their lives, sometimes by a wide margin.  So if you are throwing out the clothes that are too small, you are setting yourself up for a big hit to your budget if you throw them out.  Same thing for the big clothes.  It is sadly possible that you may eat your way back into them and if you don't have them around, you are likely to wear your too-small clothes past the point of decency because you can't bear to go out and buy that larger size.  


So my advice is to keep them, but not in your everyday closet.  They are taking up valuable real estate you need for today's clothes.  One idea is to store them under the bed in your suitcases.  You can put them temporarily in a clean laundry basket if you want to take a trip and then pop them back in the suitcases when you come back.  Or if you've been on a cruise, it may be time to bring out those big mama outfits for a while!  Or rubbermaid tubs in the garage or storage area.  I've tried those space saver bags and actually some of my skinny jeans are languishing in some of them right now!  


Same thing with out of season clothes.  No one wants to be digging through capris and tank tops in chilly January.  Move them out if you can, or at least rotate them to the back part of the closet.  If items need repair, either take them somewhere, set aside a sewing day, or toss them out.  You might accidentally wear them and get all the way to work before you realize there is a hole in a very awkward place - I've done it before!  


Another category I forgot to mention is dressy clothes.  If you're like me, dressy occasions are few and far between, but you do need to have a few nice outfits for those special occasions.  I keep a small section way at the back for my few dressy outfits and also for a few sentimental pieces that I'll never fit into again, but have special meaning for me.  

I should just take some pictures of them and release them to people who would enjoy them, but I feel I can spare the room for them at this point because I have gotten rid of a lot of excess clothing to me a little extra breathing room for them.  I do use those dry cleaner bags for those pieces because they get a little dusty sitting back there.  However, my square dance clothes are another story.  We haven't danced in years and aren't likely to soon, but square dance clothes are hard to find, so I have them in a Rubbermaid tub, just in case we get bit by the dancing bug again.  


OK, now that you are down to your core wardrobe, it's time to organize it so you can see what you have.  Everyone has a different way of doing this, so you need to figure out what makes the most sense to you.  You can organize by style, color, type of clothing, or work vs. weekend wear.  That is up to you.  However, it is helpful if you can group items of similar types together.  For instance, if you have five black T-shirts, it's helpful to keep them all together so you can see if one or two could be decluttered, or at least so you don't buy three more of them!  


For organizing accessories, I think Ikea is the place to go.  They have a ton of inexpensive ideas for organizing shoes, scarves, necklaces, socks, and anything else you care to organize.  I have a couple of very pretty green & white striped boxes from Ikea that hold most of my accessory items.  They have about a dozen little compartments each that are just perfect for that seldom-used scarf or belt.  And they fit perfectly on top of my shelf. 


What are your best tips for keeping your closet under control? 


Come back every Monday for a fresh dose of Clutterbugs.  If you'd like to see past posts on the subject, just click the label at the bottom of this post for a complete list. 

 

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Hi all - I'm offering a special deal for you today from some friends of mine over at Chic Chick Media (You'll notice their widget over on my sidebar). I know all of the participants personally, so I guarantee this is a legit deal. And I've seen the camera straps myself and they are super cute!

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If you've got a SLR camera, you certainly want your camera strap to reflect your creative personality. Choose from the 3 straps below for $15! (+$3 shipping)

"You're not boring, why should your camera be?"

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Hurry, this offer ends on Sunday at midnight

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This week, I thought I'd show off my projects from January.


This is a card I put together with one of the new Sale-a-bration sets called Bliss. It's totally adorable.


Here is our "official" Valentine card.  I love the combination of Cherry Cobler with black & white.  If you look carefully you'll see a bit of paisley embossing in the background.  Then you just take the scalloped circle & trim it to make the pretty dress.  I used Night & Day patterned paper.


Our technique this month was Watercoloring. I found a YouTube video that had a watercoloring project that was almost exactly this set, so I tried it first with markers and then with watercolor pencils. I finally decided I liked it best with the markers and the aqua painters.


This was our attempt at making our own patterned paper. I don't remember the name of this set from the Spring mini catalog, but it's a dead ringer for the old set Watercolor Minis. I'm glad they brought it back even if it is in a new form.

This was our 3D project this month. It goes on a drink bottle and you put a drink packet in the little pocket. Makes a nice little giftie for teachers, neighbors, etc. Looks cute with the new Botanical Patterns paper.



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If there’s one thing that fascinates me about money, it’s about how prices fluctuate on things.



Take a cashmere sweater for instance:

Full price: $75
Sale Price: $67.50 (10% off)
Mega Sale Price:  $56.25 (25% off)
End of Season Clearance Price:  $15 (80% off)
Yard Sale Price: $5

 

Now, this is exactly the same item. It took exactly the same amount of labor and materials to produce, the same amount of shipping, packaging, etc. but the price can vary from ridiculously high (I would never pay $75 for a sweater unless it was made of solid gold angel’s wings) to ridiculously low. Up until you get to the yard sale price, this is a brand new, yummy cashmere sweater. Even at the yard sale, it may have been worn only once, or never at all, if it didn’t fit, or was a gift that wasn’t liked.

Typically, I think most of us wait for sale prices #1 or #2. By the time it gets to the clearance rack price, the sweater is definitely seen as less-than-desirable and at that point, the store is willing to take a complete loss on it just to free up the space for newer and more desirable merchandise. Same thing for the yard sale – the person just wants to get a little something out of it, even if it isn’t anywhere near the actual value of the item.

The price is based on two basic things – the desirability of the item vs. the eagerness of the buyer to own it, also known as supply and demand. If it’s at the beginning of the season and the sweater is in a popular color and style, particularly if it’s in a trendy-looking store, some women might think $75 is a very reasonable price for it. Not me, but some women would, especially if it has a fancy designer label. 

But I’ll tell you, I’m so much more impressed with someone who got a terrific deal on something, than by someone who spent a ridiculous amount on it!  I know they think I’m impressed when they are bragging about their new $200 boots, but inside I’m thinking “sucker!” 

Books, movies, or toys – I almost never buy them at the retail price. Instead I pop straight over to Amazon and see if they’ve got a New or Like New copy at half the price. I don’t think I’ve ever once been disappointed. And with my Amazon Prime membership, I don’t even have to pay shipping.

It’s even more so with big ticket items like cars and houses. I would never ever consider building a new house. I’ve heard enough nightmare stories about shady contractors and bad home warranties for me to steer way clear of that mess. And you are in a much better bargaining position with a house or a car that’s in good used shape, so you can end up with a much better product than you would have been able to afford if you had bought it brand new.

Just makes good sense. Yeah, you don’t get the new car smell, or the bragging rights, but you do get to brag about what a great deal you worked out with the salesman. I saved my son $3,000 on his first car. I know because another girl had bought it and had to return it, and I saw the original contract in the glove box. Her price was almost exactly $3,000 higher for the car we purchased just two weeks later. Even in this economy, that’s some sharp bargaining.

PS: When buying a car or a house, try to time it for the last few days of the month. These salesmen have monthly competitions with large prizes at stake and sometimes they are willing to work extra hard to give you a good deal if that one sale will put them up into a higher prize bracket.

So when you are shopping for the items you need, whether they are large or small, take a minute and think hard where you could get it at a better price. Be creative and be patient, you may get a heck of a good deal out of it.

Come back every Thursday to get a fresh dose of Smart Money.  If you'd like to see past posts on the subject, please click the label below for a complete list.

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The other day, I was over at the home of one of my "cleanie" friends and it's really got me thinking. This lady had a gorgeous house that was beautiful and apparently effortlessly clean. I was in several different rooms during my visit and all of them were gorgeously decorated and looking wonderful even though she works a full-time job and wasn't expecting visitors.

I used to feel really bad about myself when I would go into homes like this. Now I try to use people like this as an example and a way to get ideas. Obviously, I'll never manage to keep my home exactly like this because she has that "born organized" gene and I don't, but I think it's an opportunity to learn. The interesting thing is that people like this probably don't spend HALF the time cleaning that we do. Because they've got those naturally neat habits, they just sort of pick things up all the time as they are going about their day, so they never have a big mess to deal with like I do. And apparently this has rubbed off on her husband and children, which is wonderful. I've seen both her kids rooms and they are just as nice as the rest of the house.

I have several friends like this and there's one thing I've noticed. They all seem to be in the category, I would term as "well-to-do" or even quite wealthy. They certainly have beautiful homes in nice neighborhoods that are full of beautiful furniture and decor. This leads me to kind of a chicken or egg question. Are they doing well because they have neat habits, or do they have neat habits because they are well to do?

Personally, I kind of think it is the first one. I think they are doing well because of the neat habits they have developed. The good habits that make for a nice house are the same habits that make for a good worker and a good parent. What employer doesn't want an employee who is organized, meticulous, and self-disciplined? And these same skills come in very handy as a parent. I know that my kids struggle a lot in school, not because they aren't really, really smart, but because I don't do well in helping them keep organized.

Here's an interesting thought. What if we were to take like three months and really focus on building our routines and getting our house into this kind of shape? I'll bet that would help us have the confidence and the skills to go out and get a better job and do a much better job with managing our money. We'd probably be much better parents too.

I've heard of this before. Flylady has said many times that messy houses are often tied with other problems, such as weight issues, money problems, marital problems and low-self esteem. But it's kind of like a spider web. When you tighten up one thread in the web, the other ones just automatically tighten up as well. And what a great goal. Wouldn't it be just wonderful if we could all have a clean house, lots of money, great kids, AND a skinny body - whoohoo!  

Come back every Monday for a fresh dose of Clutterbugs.  If you'd like to see past posts on the subject, click on the label for a complete list.

 

 
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My kids are always endlessly interesting and original.  Every day I wonder what new thing they are going to come up with.  One day, I came out to find Blake had put his socks on the chair leg.  

Since the pictures didn't have a lot of color in them, I wanted to give the page a lot of color and texture to set them off properly.  I used our Kiwi Kiss for the background and Only Orange and Bashful Blue for the accent ribbons.  I even put a nice pattern on the scalloped edges of the ribbon.   






 
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I'm not sure if this is more of a parenting tip or a decluttering tip, but it is something that has helped me.  I have specific policies on certain things and I refer to them frequently.  For instance if my son asks to keep his Sobe bottle, or the bottle for his favorite Jones Soda, I simply refer him to my "trash policy".  My trash policy states that we do not keep things in our house that are classified as trash, so that's a definite no on Sobe or Jones Soda bottles.


Basically, it just saves a lot of arguments and makes sure that things are done in a uniform way.  I also have a "noise policy" - no unnecessary noises, a policy on animal cruelty - not allowed in any form, and a policy for when chores need to be done - I don't do "later" or "wait a minute" ever. 


I think it's helpful for the kids because they know exactly what to expect in certain circumstances, and it also helps me to be more consistent as a parent.  It doesn't stop them from pushing the line, naturally, but it's a lot easier when he's kicking the table leg for the tenth time to calmly say "What is my noise policy?" than to snap "Would you cut out that *#%*@ noise?"


What policies does your house need? 


Come back every Monday for a fresh dose of Clutterbugs.  If you'd like to see previous posts on the subject, click the label at the bottom of this post for a complete list. 


 
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