I hear from a lot of women that they feel they are a "Perfectionist" and it’s said in smug sort of way that indicates they feel it to be a most superior virtue. I’ve heard all the variations of it, my towels have to be folded a certain way, or only *I* can load the dishwasher the right way, or even a right way to vacuum so that the marks in the carpet go exactly the right way. Or even I can’t go to sleep unless my kitchen is spotless or all my shoes are put away.

I know these people think they are doing a good thing and God bless them – or as they say in the South “Bless their little hearts”. But I’d like to present a differing opinion on perfectionism. It has a cost and most people don’t ever realize it.

I’m all for doing a good job and you certainly want to try your best when you are doing a task, but to declare that there is a right way to do something that only you know, or to set yourself up as the authority for all things linen closet- related is actually a form of bullying behavior.

You are saying that it’s” Your Way or the Highway”, both to yourself and to the people who live with you and that can only lead to resentment, unnecessary stress, and hard feelings on both sides. You feel the pressure to live up to your standards, even if it isn’t convenient for you. You must clean that kitchen to that perfect standard every night, even if you are exhausted, because if you don’t you’ll feel like a failure.

And you are spending your precious, irreplaceable time with “objects” rather than people. A friend of mine at work said his wife was such a perfectionist that she vacuumed three times a day. And all I could think of was his three young children sitting on the couch holding their feet up so this crazy lady they called Mommy could run around freaking out about a stupid carpet! No time to play today kids, I've got a carpet that needs cleaning...

And heaven help the family member who offers to help you. You’ll likely end up hurting their feelings by redoing the work, either right in front of them with a few scathing comments, or later on when you notice it isn’t up to your standards. Then you feel put upon because you end up doing most of the work and no one wants to help. It’s just a never-ending cycle.

Case in point, my Mother-in-law was a perfectionist and proud of it. And she did keep a very nice house. It was always nice and tidy and when she died, she left behind a houseful of unmarred white furniture and scratch-free tables and chairs. But she also left behind a lot of resentment and bad feelings. During the twenty or so years she was my MIL, I’m sure she did lots of nice things for me, but those aren’t the things I remember about her.

Instead I remember her yelling at me for not squashing down a milk carton before I put it into the trash, or grouching about my toddler leaving finger prints on her windows, or being cranky and nervous when the grandkids were around because they would leave toys around or touch her white furniture with sticky fingers. I remember being rebuffed if I would offer to load the dishwasher or help with the cooking, but then being criticized because I never helped.

It’s funny – when we had our first house, I cleaned like a tornado for my first mother-in-law visit. I was so nervous and sure enough, she started criticizing me the moment she hit the door and picked out things I had never even thought to notice. I was crushed. But a few weeks later, her older sister stopped by for a visit and even though the house wasn’t nearly as clean, she had nothing but heart-felt compliments for us. I think in a lot of ways, we loved my husband’s sweet-natured aunt a lot more than we did his sour-tongued mother.

So, what is YOUR perfectionism costing you? Have you ever thought about how your husband or children feel when you push them away or criticize when they offer to help? How do you want to be remembered?

Remember those perfect, unscratched tables my MIL left behind? They are in my family room now and my husband takes great delight in putting his feet on them, or leaving rings on them or seeing the scratches on them. It’s his way of telling her that those things just didn’t matter, but the people in her life did and she was just too blind to see it.

What is driving this almost compulsive need for perfection? Listen closely to the voice in your head. Is it a mother, a grandmother, or an overly harsh teacher? Is it just a feeling that you aren’t good enough – because you are, I’m sure of it. We’re all basically good people with a few small faults. Is it a way to control one thing in your life because you can’t control other things? Do you feel like there is going to be a special gold plaque for you in heaven because you kept the most perfectly organized silverware drawer on the block? Because I’m pretty sure there isn’t.

You probably haven’t ever tried, because you probably thought it was a good thing, but have you ever tried to overcome it? I challenge you to give it a try. Think about the one area that is your absolute must-have perfect area, whether it’s your closet (my brother-in-law hangs all his shirts organized by color, on hangers exactly ½” apart – sheesh!), or your pantry, or your linen closet.

Now go and grit your teeth and deliberately mess it up. Go ahead, go do it now. Just mess it all up and then shut the door and walk away. It will probably trigger a panic attack or at least a feeling of extreme uneasiness. But just wait it out and keep repeating to yourself – it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter. Resist all urges to fix it or to apologize to people about it. No one cares but you. Seriously.

Just let it be for a couple of days and soon I think you’ll find that it really doesn’t matter. It’s a silly thing floating around in your head is all. It’s just a linen closet for heaven’s sake! No one in this universe, other than your crazy (mother, aunt, mother-in-law, or your overly compulsive friend) cares what you do in the privacy of your own linen closet.

Now breathe and go make some fun memories with your family. Go have some ice cream, take a nature walk, or go jump on the trampoline with them. Maybe throw in a round of Monopoly or miniature golf. Those are the memories you want them to have of you twenty years from now, not the Joan Crawford and the wire hanger type….




By TwitterButtons.com

I haven't played Writer's Workshop in a couple of weeks. I just haven't found a prompt that I could really work with. However, this time we hit the jackpot. The very last prompt was have a craft day on your blog. Now THAT I can do.

Way back before I discovered the Internet, I used to be quite the crafty girl! I still am to some degree. I'm still a demo for Stampin' Up! so I still stamp a few times a month, but not nearly as much as I used to. Anyway, here's a little Whrrl story to show off some of the fancy dancy crafts I've done over the years. Click the link below to see some of my fun creations.

By TwitterButtons.com

Words are very powerful things. Amazingly powerful things.

On any given day, you can make or break someone's day simply by praising or criticizing them. We talk so much every day, I think we really underestimate the impact of our words.

However, we all know that there are times when our kids or our husband tunes us out or just ignores things we say. Yes, even my perfect husband and kids!

Here's something funny. They may ignore what you say, but the will almost always pay attention to something you have written down. Isn't that strange?

I've done this many times. I wish I could say that I'm one of those Moms who puts loving, encouraging notes in their lunch boxes, and creates those wonderful Hallmark moments. But that's just not the way we roll.

My written words are more likely to be do-to lists or other notes. But the important thing is that they get results.

I will typically leave notes like - "This must be put away by 5:00 today." "Please sweep and mop the floors today." "Please do not leave dishes on the counter." "You may not put mail on the table - please put in the mail basket."

Or I will leave a honey-do list on the white board for little things I need my husband to do. Even if I've verbally asked him to do the exact same things, he won't actually do them until I put them on the board.

Isn't that weird? Oh well, we have a strange and unique relationship - he's strange and I'm unique (ha ha!).

Do you know who else this works for? Me. I will leave all kinds of notes for myself - "You are not allowed on the computer before 9:00 AM", "15 4 5" = 15 minutes of exercise for five days. "Be nice - Choose the soft answer"

Anyway, give it a try and see how it works for you. And be sure to thank your family when they comply with your requests. A little sincere gratitude helps a lot too.

Be sure and come back next Monday and Friday for the next installment in my Clutterbugs series. To see the rest of the series, just click the Clutterbugs tag at the bottom of this post and it will bring up a list of them.



By TwitterButtons.com

I don't know how many of you have grown kids as I do, but once your kids are actually out of the house, it's surprising how much "stuff" they think they are entitled to leave behind. It's stuff that they don't really need and don't actually plan to use, but Lord help you if you try to get rid of it.

Do you really want to be storing that stuff clear into your retirement? It's really just clutter, taking up space that you could use for more useful items.

If you really want to get rid of it, you need to have a plan. If your kids are flaky like mine, just asking them to come and get it isn't really going to work. Going through boxes of old junk, even their own, isn't going to be their idea of fun and it's not going to be high on their list of priorities.

One thing to do is to set a firm date. Give them a good month or so to get around to it, but then let them know that after that date, the free storage deal is going to be over. Then give them a head start on the project. Go through the stuff and start sorting it into some general piles - clothes, books, papers, school projects, etc.

Technology can help you with this project. Get out your digital pictures and document the items as you go. You can easily post the pictures to a Flickr account and share it with them. That way, they can see exactly what they are dealing with and that is likely to give them a little motivation to save some of the things that are more important to them. If nothing else, you can have them tag the pictures of the things they want and the things you can get rid of.

Then just box it up and leave it in the garage for them to come, get it (or not). And enjoy your now uncluttered space. Just try not to fill it up with all of your old, unneeded junk.

Be sure and come back next Monday and Friday for the next installment in my Clutterbugs series. To see the rest of the series, just click the Clutterbugs tag at the bottom of this post and it will bring up a list of them.



By TwitterButtons.com

As I mentioned in My Olympic Memories post - I was very heavily involved in the 2002 Olympics here in Salt Lake and in some of the other sporting events we've had around town, like the World Cup.

Because of these experiences, I've had a unique behind-the-scenes view of some of the events, so I thought I'd share some of the interesting things I've seen.

- You see all this fancy equipment that is supposed to measure things to hundredths of a second or fractions of an inch, but I thought it was hilarious to see how they figure the distance for the Ski Jumping. They have a line of about 10 volunteers that stand in a line going down the mountain. The one closest to where the jumper lands raises his or her hand. Very high tech! For some reason this has always struck me as so funny!

- On the other hand, I got to be in the timing booth at the World Cup Speed Skating event. Now that one really is high tech. They have like three different camera angles that all coordinate a feed up to a guy in the booth and it does a series of still pictures of the race finish. Then he has a computer that measures the fractions of an inch between the three winning athletes. Very precise.

They have a computer set up to Google the results so they can tell when a world record has been broken, or where an athlete has broken his personal best time. However, they had a guy in the booth who was a former competitor. This guy was such an authority on the sport that he could quote most of the stats right off the top of his head.

- All those beautiful lifts that you see in Figure Skating - they HURT like a bugger. Just imagine having your entire body weight resting in a single handspan. It totally kills. I did a few simple lifts in dance classes, back when I was young and skinny(er) and I was surprised at how painful they were.

- If someone offers you tickets for skeleton, bobsled or luge, you might want to think about it. It's exciting because you can get literally within arms length of the athletes - probably closer than any other sport. However, you can only see the little section of the track where you are standing. Then you end up watching the rest of it on a big jumbo-tron. You're much better off watching it at home with all the great commentary to explain it.

- I got to watch the athletes training on the bobsled track. It's funny because they use their old suits to practice in rather than the fancy ones they have for the TV cameras. They would get up off the sleds and every single one of them had big holes in the tushies!!! It was so funny! There was one athlete we were laughing about, she was an Israeli woman, but we were taking bets on a gender check. She was built like a Mack truck and from the back, you'd swear it was a man, even in those skin tight suits.

- I also got to take a tour of the facility I was standing at the top of the bobsled run. It was awesome! They said, don't step on the ice at the top of the track. If you slip, we will not be able to catch you and you will end up in a frozen heap at the bottom of the track. It's that slippery.

- Also got to stand at the top of the Ski Jump. Again, it was awesome, but it was terribly intimidating. I'm not particularly afraid of heights, but that thing is HIGH. You can't even see the bottom of the jump because of the way it curves. I can't imagine how terrifying it must feel to stand up there for the first time and prepare to launch yourself out into space with no view of the bottom, and no type of safety equipment possible. These are some brave people!

- Do you know how they practice all the fancy jumps for the moguls and some of the other events? They do it over a huge swimming pool! It's hilarious - they even have a whole show they put together on Saturday nights in the summer. You sit there on the grass and eat your dinner and you get to watch all these great athletes practicing their jumps. The music is blaring and they have a sort of a conveyor belt with metal wheels going down the mountain. They strap on their skis and roll down the side of the mountain fast as a freight train and they do their all these great tricks and flips.

- Just a heads up if you ever go to a Winter Olympic event, the European fans are crazy! We were at a quarter final match between Finland and Denmark. Their fans come out in huge groups, dressed up in all sorts of crazy outfits, with cow bells and horns, it is party time, and they are having the time of their lives. They even have party houses they set up in the city and anyone of their particular descent is welcome to come down and hang with them. Next time they come to town, I'm totally going to join the party, even if I have to wear Leiderhosen!

- Pin trading. Pin trading is HUGE. There are people who come to town and do nothing but trade pins all day. One of the guys who stayed with us, had a whole suitcase full of them and even had his own special pins custom made and gave us each a set. Our green jello pins were hugely popular and so were the Mascot pins, which I was interested in for obvious reasons (if you didn't read my earlier post, I was a part of the Mascot team). Find out what the good pins are, get a bunch of them and just wade right in and trade like crazy. Even if people don't speak English, they'll trade you if you've got the kind of pins they're looking for. It's a great way to meet people and get a good feel for the spirit of the Olympics.

- I wanted to see some of the Paralympic events, but after taking two weeks of (with pay) to work the Olympics, I couldn't really get any more time off. But I did manage to get tickets to the Gold Medal Paralympic Hockey. I was shocked that they were only $10 a piece. The Paralympics are like the Rodney Dangerfield of the sporting world, they don't get the respect that they deserve and the networks won't even show them on TV. If you ever get a chance to go to a Paralympic event, by all means go. You'll come away inspired.

Here's how they do the hockey for the Paralympics - they are typically paraplegics or amputees, and they have them strapped into a sort of little canoe-shaped sled. And they can really manuever in that thing - it's cool. To get around, they have a little stick. I can't remember if it's one or two, but one end is a paddle like a hockey stick to hit the puck with, and the other end is spiked for them to push themselves around with. It doesn't have as much back and forth movement as regular hockey because it is kind of hard for them to propel themselves for long distances, but it's just as exciting!



By TwitterButtons.com

I'm going to talk to you about something that no one wants to talk about. You and your husband are going to die some day. Yes, really. Do you have a will and a trust? Yes, I can see your eyes rolling. I can see that guilty look on your face. This is something you HAVE TO DO! Yes, I am yelling at you.

As I said, we have lost four parents and not one of them had a really proper will set up. This cost us THOUSANDS of dollars - real serious actual dollars that we could have used to buy cars, pay for college, or put towards retirement and instead it was just wasted on lawyers, court fees, and other unnecessary expenses.

I think most people have no idea at all about what happens to your property after you die. Let's look at two scenarios:

John and Sally are married and own a house that is in both of their names. They have two kids and no will. John suddenly has a heart attack and dies.

In this scenario, Sally would have no access to any money other than what she can grab out of their checking account or what she might have stashed in her name. She can't sell the house, his vehicle, or any personal belongings of his until it is cleared by the court, which may take months and will require very high cost legal representation.

Our lawyer cost us $21,000 for a simple transfer of property. If you can't come up with that kind of money (and who can these days?), you are going to be stuck with a property that you can't easily sell and will still have to make payments on and maintain.

If the estate is large enough to require probate, the state will automatically take 10-18% right off the top. Chew on that for a minute.

In the meantime, Sally is grieving, trying to figure out how she is going to support her family, dealing with insurance companies, and lawyers, and real estate agents, maybe for the first time ever and she is going to be tearing her hair out and downing tranquilizers just to keep her sanity.

Now here is the second scenario. Same circumstances, but John and Sally had a properly written will and have a simple trust set up with their house and all their major property in it.

The house, vehicles, and all other property passes smoothly and automatically to Sally. All she has to do is show the death certificate to the proper parties and have John's name removed from the assets. She can mortgage them or start selling them the day after the funeral if she so chooses with no questions asked, no lawyers needed, and a minimum of taxes to be paid.

Custody of the children is prearranged with backup plans set in place as needed if both couples were to die or become incapacitated.

Which scenario would you choose? I know which one we would. About a month after my father-in-law passed, we saw what a heck of a mess we were in for with his estate, so we went out and found a good estate lawyer for our own estate.

We didn't have to go far, we found one right at the end of our street. We sat down with him for about 2 hours, answered some questions, made some decisions, and paid him about $1,000, which was without a doubt the best money we've ever spent!

Then in less than a week, we had a will for each of us, a trust, power of attorney forms, guardianship forms and everything needed for every possible combination of catastrophes that could befall our family.

That's more than I usually share in a public blog about my finances, but this is something I feel so strongly about.

As an adult and probably a parent, you have a duty to put your business in order to protect your family - you just have to. You need life insurance, wills, backup custody plans, the whole enchilada.

'Cuz I've been on the receiving end of a situation like this and I'll tell you, it ain't a pretty picture. It is easily the most stressful period of my life to date. I'm not about to put my kids through all that and I hope you won't either.

Be sure and come back next Monday and Friday for the next installment in my Clutterbugs series. To see the rest of the series, just click the Clutterbugs tag at the bottom of this post and it will bring up a list of them.



By TwitterButtons.com

Well, the 2010 Olympics are here. We watched the Opening Ceremonies as a family last night and I've been watching all the coverage today. With every event I watch it just brings back so many memories of my own Olympic experiences.

Did I mention that while I am completely indifferent to any other type of sports, I am a huge fan of the Olympics, and particularly the Winter Olympics? I grew up on this stuff, and I particularly remember the watching 1972 Olympics with my Mom when I was just 12 years old. I think I've watched every Olympics ever since.

So, when they announced that my home town of Salt Lake City, was getting the 2002 Olympics, I was just over the moon. I will always remember that moment when Juan Antonio Samaranch made the announcement - it was kind of like the day you find out you are pregnant. You're excited and terrified at the same time and no matter what, you know your life has just changed forever.

I immediately made up my mind that I was going to enjoy these games to the fullest. As soon as the website was opened, I signed up as a Volunteer. It took me three months, and five different interviews to get a spot, but I was determined to succeed. And I did succeed, in spades!



Because of my theater background, I was offered not one, but two positions with the Olympics. My first assignment was operating a spotlight at the Opening Ceremonies. Wow,that sounded so exciting, but it had one major drawback - six hour rehearsals outside in the cold January weather. Hmmmm. But on the other hand, this was the Opening Ceremonies of the Olympics. What an once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

However, the other position I was offered was kind of interesting too - I was offered a chance to be part of the Mascot team. Yes, those Mascots. Tough call. I could be up on a pole freezing my tushie off, or wearing a nice cozy fur suit and hobnobbing at all the high-toned sponsor events. Guess which one I picked?



Yes, that's me in the bunny suit. I'm so glad - my memories as a Mascot were priceless! We got to visit the Olympic Village, which was an experience I will never forget. It was so special to see all those young athletes just having the time of their lives! Our first day at the Utah Olympic Park, we got stuck in a huge snowstorm and I remember riding down the mountain on the back of an ATV holding my head on for dear life, so I wouldn't traumatize some poor kid!

I also remember getting lost on the bobsled track one day. You are only supposed to be in the costumes for 20-30 minutes at a stretch because of the incredible heat, but we missed our turn off and ended up stuck in the crowds for over an hour in the hot sun! Fortunately, I wasn't in costume that day, I was assisting some of the other people, but the poor people in the costumes were drenched in sweat and about ready to pass out.

We also got to go to some of the sponsored events - like a photo shoot on the ice with Kristi Yamaguchi, and a visit to the Athletes Lounge at the Medals Plaza. We got to be photographed with some of the medal winning athletes and it's such an awesome feeling to think that there are now pictures of us all over the world!

In addition to being a volunteer, I also got to be a spectator. Figure Skating is my very favorite event and I tried to purchase a package of Figure Skating tickets, but those were so much in demand. I remember just crying in disappointment when I didn't get them.

But I decided to make the best of it and get what tickets I could. You had to call in to get tickets on the day they were released, and I remember that I figured out how to jack the phone system, so I was able to get through on my 6th or 7th call. Score! Evidently, the Olympic spirits were smiling on me since I managed to get a great package of tickets. We had bobsled tickets, snowboarding, ski jumping, hockey, speed skating and luge.

For all the big events of the Olympics, we got to be there. Our two older sons were there for the snowboarding when the US won Gold, Silver and Bronze in the same event. When Apolo Anton Ohno had that historic fall during the Short Track event, I was there! I saw the whole thing. That arena just went crazy, especially when he came back and won the race later on.

Remember that whole scandal they had with the Russian judge? I was there at the Ice Dancing when the Canadian pair Peltier and Sale got their duplicate medals. Amazing! I really lucked out on that one. We had a whole group of volunteers staying at our house and at my Mom's house. One of them had bought Ice Dancing tickets for he and his wife, but she couldn't make it, so as a thank-you, he took me to the Ice Dancing finals. What a thrill.

We even got to be part of the Paralympics. Although I didn't volunteer for them, we lucked out and my company offered us tickets for the Gold Medal Hockey game for $10 each. That was the best $20 we ever spent! I think the Paralympic games really get ripped off. They are just as great as the Olympics, especially since these are people dealing with such challenges, and they don't even televise them. That stinks because that was easily one of the most exciting sporting events we've ever seen.

I even have a bit of history with these guys:


Two years ago, I volunteered at the World Cup at the Salt Lake Olympic Oval. Among some of the other fun things I got to do, I got to help with the drug testing. And who was the first athlete I was picked to escort to the testing lab? Shani Davis, who is best friends with Apolo Anton Ohno.

Well, I didn't just get picked, I plotted to get him. Seriously, I did. I could see who was coming up and who was likely to get tested - they usually test all the winning athletes and just a handful of the other guys. So I made sure I was standing at the testing area right when Shani's race started, so I would get picked for him.

Naturally, on our way to the lab, we stopped off for a little congratulatory visit with his buddy who was hanging out with silver medalist Jeremy Wotherspoon (who is competing in his 4th Olympics this year). So I got to meet three medal winning athletes on the same night. Who says that volunteering is a thankless job?

So enjoy the Olympics with your family, and if they ever come to your hometown, or anywhere you can get to. GO! Go and volunteer because you will make memories you will have for your whole life!

PS: Did I mention that I got to see Shani in his underwear? There's something not everyone can say. It's weird, some of the guys change out of their suits right there on the skate floor. In their little tighty-whiteys right there in front of God and everybody - bizarre!





By TwitterButtons.com

I think I am in a unique position to understand the importance of not hoarding things. Over the course of our marriage, we have lost all four of our parents and had to clean out two full houses worth of "stuff".

Believe me, these people were hoarders, bless their little hearts. Not the scary type of hoarders who save mountains of newspapers and stuff, but normal "Mom & Pop type" hoarders.

It made me sad when I was going through my Mom's house, particularly her craft room, which was crammed to the rafters with unfinished projects, art supplies, and expensive, unread craft books.

I kept thinking if she'd spent more of that time and money on doing fun stuff with us instead of all this useless junk, what great memories I would have instead of cussing her while I was wading through all this stuff and trying to sell it for pennies on the dollar at an estate sale.

You need to think long term and realize how this might come to roost on your children. If things go in the normal way, you might have 20, 30, or even 40 years before this becomes an issue, but we all know that this can happen very unexpectedly.

My cousin and his wife died suddenly in their mid-30's and left behind 3 orphaned children. Things like that happen sometimes, and if something terrible like that happens, do you want your children to have to deal with your whole house full of junk, in addition to all the other traumatic stuff they would have to deal with?

Cleaning out a house after a death is a terrible thing. It's exhausting, both physically and emotionally, it's heartbreaking, it's frustrating and annoying, and it's just about the least fun thing you can imagine doing.

My in-laws were very clean people and not pack rats (so we thought) but we had a big eye opener when we started digging into the drawers and closets and all the little hidden areas of the house - ugh!

They had saved every pay stub, every birthday card, every paid bill, and 20 years worth of bank statements - what a mess. And because we were out of state, we had three days to do the whole house. I've never worked so hard in my entire life and my kids and husband did too. Everyone hated me by the end of the week, but we got most of it done and the neighbors and people from Goodwill had to deal with the rest of it.

So take a minute a go around your house and put yourself in your kid's shoes and imagine them having to deal with your house if something happened to you. Then take some action and get rid of some of that stuff.

Be sure and come back next Monday and Friday for the next installment in my Clutterbugs series. To see the rest of the series, just click the Clutterbugs tag at the bottom of this post and it will bring up a list of them.



By TwitterButtons.com

This week's Writer's Workshop is to do a list of Do's and Don'ts. Oh my gosh, I thought you'd NEVER ask!

I have long wanted to do a list of the do's and don'ts of blogging.

Disclaimer: Just to clarify, this is *my* idea about the do's and don'ts of blogging. I would never tell someone what they could or couldn't put on their blog. To me, your blog is like your own Country and you are entitled to determine the laws that govern your Country. However, if you want me to ever visit your Country, you might want to pay some attention to this little list. Unless you just don't care, in which case you can bite me (that's allowed under the laws of my Country).

Let's start with the Don'ts:

Don't put auto-music on your blog. Really, just don't do that to people. I think this is the item that people complain about the most. I don't know how many times I've been startled by "ambush" music, or autoplay videos and usually, I just hit the back button and jump right back off of it. If you want to put some great music on with a little button for me to push, that's great. I've been known to hang out on a blog all day that has really great music.

Don't blog about poop or other bodily functions, yours or your kids. I think this is my absolute biggest pet peeve. I have seen people post about nasty diaper blow-outs, barfing kids, yeast infections (in painful detail), menstruation, I mean just about anything disgusting you can imagine. Why, people, why? Out of all the things you can post about, why do you pick something disgusting? There was a featured blogger on SITS a while back that had two of her three best posts that were about her kid's poop. Out of her whole blog, that was what she wanted the whole blogging world to know about her. I just don't get it.

Don't post the same kind of things day after endless day. I think it's great when someone has a regular weekly feature like my Clutterbugs posts, or Wordless Wednesday or something, but I've abandoned a few blogs because they were just too boring. This originally started as a blog to highlight my Stampin' Up! projects, but I just got so bored with seeing the same kinds of stamped projects day after day.

Here's a don't for the commenters. Don't set your account up with NoReply@Blogger. That is so pesky when you want to answer a question or just thank someone for a nice comment. I've even had to disqualify someone from one of my giveaways because I had no way to reach them. Here is a link to a tutorial on how to fix this little problem.

Same thing for that darn word verification thing. Just don't do it. I can see why you want to keep the spammers and the nasties off your blog, but if you have Comment Approval on, you don't need the word verification thing too. It's like a belt and suspenders - ugh!

Now for the Do's

Do post lots of fun, interesting, and heartfelt posts. You don't have to share every secret you've ever had with us, but that's the whole point of having a blog is to share your personality and experiences with us.

Do post the occasional contest and giveways. I don't live for these things, but it is nice to have a chance to win a little swag now and then. I especially like the ones where a little skill is involved. Rhea of Texas Word Tangle is great at this. She does a contest where she takes pictures of everyday objects and you have to guess what they are.

Do return comments. I'm not perfect about this, but I do try to leave at least 20 or 30 comments a week, which is about all I have time for. I always like to put my two cents in on different topics and I like my bloggy friends to feel loved and supported.

Do post often. I know, I am SO guilty of this. I knew I would never be able to be one of those fabulous bloggers who could come up with a daily post, so I never even had that goal, but I do try to post at least a few times a week. I do get a little annoyed with people who don't blog for weeks or months at a time. Why have a blog if you aren't going to post sometimes?




By TwitterButtons.com

You know, I think what gets us into trouble sometimes is that some jobs have multiple steps - a cleaning cycle, if you will.

You don't just get to dump the clothes into the washer and be done with it. You have to wash them, dry them, fold them, and then put them away and if you skip any step in that cycle, you will end up with a wet, smelly, wrinkled mess.

Same thing with dishes - you can't just put them in the dishwasher, you have to put soap in, start it, unload it and then start a new cycle.

I think it would help us if we could think of our tasks in terms of the whole cycle instead of just one part of it. When you do laundry, make a commitment to complete the whole cycle. Make a plan, set a timer, delegate part of the cycle, basically do whatever needs to happen to make sure that the chore isn't going to get abandoned mid-cycle.

I know that we all have a lot going on and some of us (I especially mean me!) have some ADD tendencies. But that doesn't excuse you from doing what needs to be done, it just means that you have to work harder at it and that you need to use some extra strategies to make it work for you.

A lot of us like checklists. I know I do and I get a ton more done when I take the time to use them.

But the question is what do you put on your to-do list? Do you just put "Do laundry" and hope for the best?

Wouldn't it be better to put each step of the cycle as a separate but related task? That way you'll be reminded to complete ALL the steps and besides, then you get three or four check marks instead of just one! And we all know that more check marks are better than less!

Give it a try and then leave me some comments and tell me how it worked for you.

Be sure and come back next Monday and Friday for the next installment in my Clutterbugs series. To see the rest of the series, just click the Clutterbugs tag at the bottom of this post and it will bring up a list of them.



By TwitterButtons.com

Here is a quick and easy cooking tip I learned from a book called Queen of the Castle. It's called Whack-a-meal. What you do is pre-brown your hamburger using your crock pot. You put a couple of pounds of hamburger in your crock pot and leave it for 4 hours on low - stir every hour or so.

You drain it and let it cool. Then put it into gallon sized zip lock freezer bags. Be sure to get it as flat as you can and get all the air out so it won't get burned in the freezer. When you're ready to use it, you just whack it on the counter a few times to loosen up the frozen hamburger and pop it into your recipe. Isn't that clever?

Here's a couple of tips I picked up from MeckMom.com. She has some wonderful tips. One of her ideas is to put a special hook in the bathroom or laundry room especially for wet bathing suits. How many times have you found a wet bathing suit lying on a bed, or getting moldy in a plastic sack somewhere? If kids have a specific place to put their suits, this won't happen as much.

Another tip of hers is for changing clothes from one season to another. Especially in a snowy area like Utah, changing around seasonal clothes is a big deal. What you do is to put one of those big Rubbermaid tubs in your laundry room when you are ready for "the change".

Then as you do laundry, you just sort the clothes and fold the out-of-season clothes into the Rubbermaid tub. This frees up space in your drawers and closets for the new season worth of clothes. In about two weeks, you're totally done. Easy peesey!

Here's a tip for dealing with sentimental clutter. If you have something that has a lot of sentimental value for you, but you don't really like it, take a picture of it. Put it in a scrapbook page, make a journal entry or whatever, but don't let something you hate remain in your house.

I did this with a dresser my Mom had. I never really liked it, but after she died, I just couldn't bear to part with it. It was just something that I always remembered from my childhood. I almost kept it, but then my sister suggested I take a picture of it, and that just satisfied that emotional need for me. Now if I could just find that picture....

Be sure and come back next Monday and Friday for the next installment in my Clutterbugs series. To see the rest of the series, just click the Clutterbugs tag at the bottom of this post and it will bring up a list of them.



By TwitterButtons.com

Speaking of Red Lobster - the reason we were there is that Matt took us out to dinner with his first "real" paycheck. He said that he wanted to say Thank You for us pushing him to get through school and get his certification as a Medical Assistant. That was really special for me because it isn't often that kids take the time to say thanks to their parents.

Speaking of kids - Blake's Scout troop is so funny. Every week they pick a word and each Patrol has about 2 minutes to make up a little cheer centered around that word. This week, the word was Peanut. Here is the cheer that Blake's Patrol came up with.

"Blake's brain is the size of a peanut. Blake eats peanuts. Therefore Blake eats his brain every day."

You had a be there. Goofy kids!

Speaking of kids - I'm having a fight with my church. Well, more like a polite disagreement. We have been waiting for MONTHS for a new Youth Pastor. They announced on Sunday that they were interviewing people for the position, but due to budget cuts, they had cut the position back from 20 to 6 - 8 hours a week.

WhatTheFrack????

I don't think so. You have a church membership of almost 300 families and I don't know how many kids and they think that having someone in there for just a couple of hours a week is going to be all they need for the Jr. High, High School & College kids. Uh no, ain't gonna fly.

Actually I was really upset and I feel this is a real deal-breaker for me. After 12 years, this is the first time I've considered moving to another church. The one where Blake's Scout troop meets has a fantastic youth program and it's very hard to sit there and know that he could just walk in the door and be all set, when you're looking at our church doing such a poor job at it.

So, I wrote a long, very heartfelt letter to the church elders and asked them to reconsider. I know money is tight, but I also know that you always manage to find money for what's important and to me the kids are the most important part of a church. So we'll see.

Final note - at work I was going through some really old E-mails today. I mean really old - back from 2002 (yeah, I'm a pack rat that way). It was so interesting to see a snapshot of my life back then. The Olympics were on and I was doing my Volunteer thing with the Mascot program. It was like going through a time capsule.

I was still selling stuff on Ebay. Matt was in Jr. High and I was fighting with his teachers, Blake was just going into Kindergarten. My Mom was just starting to get sick and my best friend was still alive. It was just interesting to go through old messages from her and think about how much I still miss her. Eight years doesn't seem like a lot, but things have changed a lot since then.

By TwitterButtons.com

Think about some of the words you use to describe your clutter. Do you ever say you are buried in junk, drowning in clutter, or suffocated by your stuff?

Why do we say stuff like that? It's not just a saying - that's the way clutter really affects us.

Besides being bad for your self-esteem, excessive clutter really affects your state of mind and adds to your stress level.

It's just impossible to relax fully when you're in a very cluttered room. Take a moment and look around the room you're in while you're reading this. Is it clean or cluttered? How does it make you feel? Take a moment and imagine how you would feel if it were more clean or more cluttered?

My guess is that you would be more anxious and stressed if it was more messy and more relaxed and peaceful if it was clean. Your mind just works that way. Your eye is always looking for clear and uncluttered surfaces to rest on and your brain is always subconsciously trying to remind you of tasks and chores you should be doing.

Is your peace of mind worth a few 15 minute cleanups? I would think it would be.

I know when I get on the ball and keep my house looking nice, I definitely notice an improvement in my mood and also in my family's mood. My kids tend to get along better, and my husband is less likely to be grouchy.

To me, that's well worth a few minutes a day of extra cleaning!

Be sure and come back next Monday for the next installment in my Clutterbugs series.



By TwitterButtons.com