I promised you another installation in my Personal Style series. I've been reading a book called "Do It Tomorrow and Other Secrets of Time Management" by Mark Forester. This is a very interesting book and I'm only partway through it. I really recommend you read it. So far, he's got some really unique and interesting ideas.

He talks about our two types of brains - the rational and reactive minds. The reactive brain is basically our human version of animal instincts. This is what allows us to react quickly when we sense danger, or when we spot an opportunity that would be helpful to us, such as a great sale item, or the last donut in the breakroom.

This mind has some advantages and some disadvantages. One disadvantage is that we may see certain things as a threat that aren't really a threat.

For instance, I don't much like exercise and my reactive brain sees it as a threat to me, even though my rational brain knows it is good for me. The rational brain is the other side of the coin. It's a lot smarter, but it's just not fast enough for some situations, particularly survival situations.

So there is this constant battle going on between the two minds and that is what makes it so difficult for me to exercise and lose the weight I want to.

This is why willpower doesn't usually work to help us change the habits we want to fix, such as cleaning and organizing our house because we've got this constant tug-of-war going on between the two parts of our brain.

So, what's a girl to do? Well, the nice thing about the reactive brain is that it isn't very smart. So you have to think of some ways to outwit it and those are some of the strategies he talks about in the book.

One strategy would be to just bring it out into the open. When you find yourself being resistant to doing something, by avoiding it or procrastinating on starting a task, you need to call yourself on it.

Realize what you are doing and take a moment to really think about it. Reiterate why this task is important to you and why it needs to be done, then think about why you might feel it would be a threat to you. Most of the time you'll find that there really isn't any serious threat to what you want to accomplish and you'll be able to talk yourself into doing it.

Another way to do it would be to kind of "sneak up on it". Tell yourself that you have no intention of starting this task, but that you want to get the materials ready just in case you might need them.

For example - tell yourself that you have no intention whatsoever of doing the dishes, but you just feel like running a sink full of hot soapy water. Then tell yourself that you'll just put one pot in to soak, maybe two, but no more. Then tell yourself that it's a shame to waste that nice soapy water, so you'll put the rest of the dishes in just to soak. By then, you've probably shut down the alarm bell in your reactive mind and you can get in there and finish washing the dishes with no more resistance.

Another strategy is to acknowledge that this task is hard for you for some reason. I have a devil of a time making phone calls -to anyone and for any reason, including businesses and close family members. I just lost a close friend of the family this week and I am feeling terrible because I only managed to call her just once this year. It's really a serious limitation in my life.

This is a classic example of my reactive brain seeing this action as a threat and doing everything possible to prevent me from doing it, regardless of what my rational brain is telling me about why I need to do it.

One way to get around this might be to promise myself a treat of some kind every time I manage to pick up the phone. Hey it works for dogs and dolphins, why not me?

Another strategy might be to put some kind of penalty on not doing it. For instance, I tell my husband that I need to make a phone call today and then I have to pay him $1 if I haven't made it by the end of the day.

I do this with my kids sometimes. If they don't make their beds, their brother has the right to go in and make it for them and charge them a $1 fee.

But you have to pick a family member who is willing to follow through on this and apply the penalty consistently if you don't do the task.

This is what Mark calls restructuring your life to support good habits. It's like putting your credit cards in the freezer. It makes it just difficult enough to use them that you likely won't bother to do it.

He even suggested a new idea of setting up a credit card with a built-in "tattletale" feature. Every time you spend more than XX dollars, an E-mail is sent to your husband - or your Mom! Boy, that would sure make me think twice about overspending!

Start thinking about some ways you can work this into your own life to overcome your own difficult habits.

Be sure and come back next Monday and Friday for the next installment in my Clutterbugs series. To see the rest of the series, just click the Clutterbugs tag at the bottom of this post and it will bring up a list of them.



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